These are the terms that describe my mother. The terms that might be used for me: confused,confounded,crazy. Mom had a really bad few days, in fact I thought she had
turned the corner, but on observation, her nurse said:"She is declining,but not actively dying." I don't know what any of this means really. When she was so sick
on Saturday and Sunday that she could not get up by herself (by that I mean from chair to wheelchair) I thought we were nearing the end.
And once again I was overwhelmed with a sadness. I don't want to lose her, but I know I all ready have. I really want the Mom I had 5 years ago, and even better 10 years ago. This tiny little quiet and confused lady; is she really my Mom? I don't even know how to describe or explain where I am at this moment. She is better today. I guess that is all I know.
Even when times are tough, she and I can still share a laugh and that is magic.
A friend of mine taught me to tap my palm and say "right here, right now". That is where I am today and of this moment. I have no idea where I will this afternoon.
I've never watched a progression like that. I think that it would be very draining.
ReplyDeleteThat is great advice...tapping your palm...I'll try that and probably end up with a sore on my hand or finger.
ReplyDeletei like Dad's comment: i think i'd end up with a sore on my hand, too. must be genetic.
ReplyDeleteyou don't have to tap so much....it is a tap after all, not a whack!
ReplyDelete