My Mom has a hospice team of 5 people, which does not count her doctor. In addition we have 2 outside paid helpers that come at least 2 days a week, sometimes more. I could make it without everyone. They make life for Mom and me so much easier. It is a scarey thing for me to give Mom a shower because she is so shakey and I can't begin to imagine what would happen if she fell.
The thing that makes life so much easier also makes it so different. I love each and every one of the people who come here, but I remember times when it was Arnie and I or just me...and it didn't matter what the house looked like or if I was dressed yet. I know it doesn't matter now either, but I think it does. They aren't coming to be entertained by me they come to care for Mom.
The first time one of the paid caregivers cleaned the kitchen and did the laundry I was embarrassed, because in my mind she was doing it because I couldn't handle things on my own. Now I am so grateful for the help and I want to cry with happiness when I come home to clean kitchen and stacked and folded laundry.
Herein lies the problem at times. People coming in and out of the house do things differently than I do. So the laundry is folded differently than I fold it. Things are put away in places that I don't put them and then Arnie wants to know where things are and I have no idea.
There are days that the Hospice people overlap and they are happy to see each other and catch up and we all talk together. It can be a little on the loud side,but happy sounds. I want my privacy but what will I do when they no longer come here? They have been taking care of Mom for a year now....and they know the family, my siblings, my neices, my daughter and grand-daughter. I know there will be a time when it is just Arnie and I and sometimes just me. It will be weird. For now, we are all here.
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